Nilargha was drunk. Di had called him many times since afternoon but he didn't bother to pick up her calls. In Fact, he had not taken any calls today. It was around 11.30pm when finally he called di.
A compassionate male voice answered the call. It was Di's husband, his brother-in-law, 'where have you been, Nil. We've been worried’. Nothing jaibu (Jamai Babu), was just lying down. Will go to sleep.
Di soon snatched the phone and scolded, ‘ Ki re! How many times have I called you, but you didn't answer. Kheyechis Kichu?’. 'Hmm’, said Nilargha indicating he had eaten for the night.
'Ki kheyechis’, Di asked to which he replied, 'Mod’. 'Please don't scold today di. Let me be on my own tonight. I'll be sober by morning. You know, I don't drink frequently now’.
Di didn't scold. She was calm. Gently, she said, ‘ ok, go to sleep. We shall talk tomorrow morning. Good night’.
He cut the call and kept the mobile aside. His mind wandered to the fateful night, 5 years ago on the same date.
Surajit was in his room. He wanted to come out to his family. He told Nilargha. Nilargha was confident. His elder sister (Di) knew. She had always supported her younger brother. She wanted to see him happy.
In a moment of happiness Surajit held him in a warm embrace and planted a kiss on his lips just when his father entered. The moment was awkward for all three. Nilargha froze where he stood and Surajit separated himself away from nilargha. His father turned down his eye, and left the room without saying a word.
Not knowing what to do, Surajit decided it was best he left for his home. It was getting late. 10pm. He didn't have the courage to meet uncle and say bye. He just walked past him sitting on the sofa. As he was about to make an exit, his father called out to Surajit, ‘I am aware what you two guys have been upto. It is better you don't come to my house again.’
Nilargha protested immediately, and shouted ,'Baba!’. The old man calmly said, 'You guys are adults. Do what you want to do outside my house.’ Then turning to Nilargha he calmly said,'Don’t bring such filth in my house again’.
Surajit turned down his gaze on the floor and rushed out of the house. Nilargha ran behind him, but he hopped on the approaching bus and sped away.
Repeated calls to his number that night went unanswered for the next one hour until finally the call was picked up for a traffic sergeant who informed that Surajit had met with an accident at Chingrighata crossing. He missed an approaching vehicle, probably absentmindedly that rammed headon into him.
Nil had rushed out but by the time he reached the hospital, Surajit was gone forever.
Nilargha had slipped into depression. It had taken multiple psychiatrist visits and a lot of support from Di and Jaibu for him just to grab a foothold on his life again. 5 years had passed. He has cut down on his drinking but on this night, he finds it impossible. Sedatives don't seem to work.
Baba used to tell him often, ‘one never forgets his first love.’ With time, Baba had become quieter and the two men had developed an invisible wall of silence between them which neither of them ventured to break.
On this night, Baba would retire early and Niladri would stay awake for the entire night thinking, if only he had not brought in the 'filth’ in his house, that fateful night...
