a story lurks in every corner...
Four facts Jo Khatam Hone Pe Bahut Takleef Dete Hein:
1. Dosti
2. Paisa
3. Pyaar
aur
4) Ravivaar!
Last Waala Toh Rula Hi Deta Hai!!!
What Indian advertisements taught me.???
1. Kareena has dandruff problem, Katrina has dry hair problem, Shilpa has hairfall problem and Priyanka has chip-chip.
2. Your complexion is more important than your qualifications.
3. If there is no salt in your kitchen you can use Toothpaste.
4. Every second oral care brand is No. 1 and recommended by every dentist in India!!!
5. If your daughter is not Ready to Get married, take her to a jewelry/textile shop.
6. Only reason why men use deodorant is to get girls.
7. Most colas cure all kinds of phobias. You will be close to a superman, if you drink these regularly!!
8. All superstars are so poor that they prefer to risk life for a cool drink than to purchase it for Rs:10
9. The special effects in shampoo ads are greater than special effects in Avatar.
10. Fruit content in shampoo and soap is more than fruit content in 99% of juices.
11. Amul has better satirical cartoonists than people who make better milk products.
12. Most people buy vehicles to travel in bad roads but complain about roads in India.
13. You can't eat Dairy Milk Silk without spreading it all over you face.
14. Nobody uses motorbikes for commuting, its only to pick up girls.
15. All soaps kill 99.9% of germs.
16. People believe that Bacardi makes music CD's and Directors special/Kingfisher make mineral water.
17. The only time mothers and daughters talk to each other, it's usually about hair oil.
18. No matter what kind of expert one is, he'll always wear a white laboratory coat.
And, finally a new word...........
19.Mutualfundinvestmentsaresubjecttomarketriskspleasereadtheofferdocumentcarefullybeforeinvesting
Banerjee in Bangla
I tried translating Banerjee to Bengali using Google translate.
This is what resulted :D
Six Golden Rules For F***ing
Generation gap
What is "GENERATION GAP"?
**Father used to walk 20 Minutes to save 20 Rs.
Son spends 20 Rs. to save 20 Minutes.
(Surprisingly both are correct...!!!)
**Cultural Gap
If electricity goes in America they call the power house.
In Japan, they test the fuse,
But In India, they check neighbour's house, "sabki gayi hai naa, phir thik hai!"
**Sense of Responsibility...
A man goes to library n asks for a book on Suicide..........
Librarian looks at him n says: "Bhai wapas kaun dene aayega???"
**GRANDFATHER TO GRANDSON:
Go hide! Your teacher is coming as you bunked school today!
GRANDSON: YOU go hide.. I told her YOU PASSED AWAY!!
**Sister to brother: What r u going to gift grandma on her b'day?
Brother: A football
Sister: But grandma does not play!
Brother: On my b'day she gave me bhagvad gita. Uska kya?
A heart touching tale
Pappu ko Heart ki bimari thi….
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Doctor ne namak na khane ki salah di...
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Pappu ki biwi hamesha pappu ka khayal rakhne lagi....
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Pappu bhi bahot sawdhani rakhne laga....
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Samay pe khana, sona, uthna,dr. ki batai exercise karna,
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khane mein namak bilkul na lena,..
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regular aur samay pe dawayilena...
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Par achanak ek din subah ko pappu bathroom ke darwaje pe mara
hua mila...
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Sab hairan the ki itni sawdhani ke baad aisa kaise ho gaya..
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Post martam ki report✉ aayi to pataa chala....
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Uske Toothpaste mein ‘Namak’ tha…
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Kya aapke toothpaste mein
namak hai.. ??
Husband-wife relationship
Never underestimate the power of 3 things:
1. Wife angry for a reason
2. Wife angry without reason
3. Wife about to get angry & looking for a reason.
The relationship between a wife & husband is very psychological.
One is psycho and the other is Logical.
Plz don't try to figure out Who is Who.... :D :D :D
Jokes on married life
Open both rooms after 2 - 3 hours & see who is Happy to see you, and who will BITE you !
(Group members are advised not to try this at home as these stunts were performed by professionals; who are now divorced; and living happily with their dog!!)
Open both rooms after 2 - 3 hours & you will be happy to see your dog waiting for you.. but you'll be angry looking at your husband sleeping like he never slept before!!!
Whenever you face a problem, see the picture & say: "If I can handle this, I can handle anything!"… Superb Attitude for Life!!
“Miss” for first year & “Stress” for rest of the years
Man inside: “I am talking to my wife”
She said- “sacrificing the admiration of hundred guys, to face the criticism of one idiot”
"For Sale – Wedding Suit, used only once by Mistake……"
Husband booked her tickets via Malaysian airlines-
Someday
When my life has passed me by
I'll lay around and wonder why
you were always there for me
One way
In the eyes of a passerby
I'll look around for another try
And'll fade away...
11 things about coffee
Physical activity Guidelines by WHO
- Children and youth aged
5–17 should accumulate at least 60 minutes of moderate- to
vigorous-intensity physical activity daily.
- Amounts of physical
activity greater than 60 minutes provide additional health benefits.
- Most of the daily
physical activity should be aerobic. Vigorous-intensity activities should
be incorporated, including those that strengthen muscle and bone*, at
least 3 times per week.
- Adults aged 18–64
should do at least 150 minutes of moderate-intensity aerobic physical
activity throughout the week or do at least 75 minutes of
vigorous-intensity aerobic physical activity throughout the week or an
equivalent combination of moderate- and vigorous-intensity activity.
- Aerobic activity should
be performed in bouts of at least 10 minutes duration.
- For additional health
benefits, adults should increase their moderate-intensity aerobic physical
activity to 300 minutes per week, or engage in 150 minutes of
vigorous-intensity aerobic physical activity per week, or an equivalent
combination of moderate- and vigorous-intensity activity.
- Muscle-strengthening
activities should be done involving major muscle groups on 2 or more days
a week.
- Older adults should do
at least 150 minutes of moderate-intensity aerobic physical activity
throughout the week or do at least 75 minutes of vigorous-intensity
aerobic physical activity throughout the week or an equivalent combination
of moderate- and vigorous-intensity activity.
- Aerobic activity should
be performed in bouts of at least 10 minutes duration.
- For additional health
benefits, older adults should increase their moderate-intensity aerobic
physical activity to 300 minutes per week, or engage in 150 minutes of
vigorous-intensity aerobic physical activity per week, or an equivalent
combination of moderate-and vigorous-intensity activity.
- Older adults, with poor
mobility, should perform physical activity to enhance balance and prevent
falls on 3 or more days per week.
- Muscle-strengthening
activities, involving major muscle groups, should be done on 2 or more
days a week.
- When older adults
cannot do the recommended amounts of physical activity due to health
conditions, they should be as physically active as their abilities and
conditions allow.
India's Mars Orbiter Mission sends first images of Mars
India creates history as Mangalyaan successfully enters Mars orbit in first attempt
European, US and Russian probes have managed to orbit or land on the planet, but after several attempts.
At 7.17 AM, the 440 Newton Liquid Apogee Motor (LAM) sizzled with life as it burnt along with ..
yester and now
Now is the conditioned room, skyline
And solitude in the apartment high...
http://allpoetry.com/poem/11594031-Yester-And-Now-by-Leaf-of-Spring
Yesterday you told me 'bout the blue blue sky
It's just another rainy Sunday afternoon
I'm wasting my time
I got nothing to do
I'm hanging around
I'm waiting for you
But nothing ever happens and I wonder .....
.....
I wonder how; I wonder why
Yesterday you told me 'bout the blue blue sky
And all that I can see is just a yellow lemon-tree
I'm turning my head up and down
I'm turning turning turning turning turning around
And all that I can see is just another lemon-tree...(Fool's Garden)
The Millennial generation
My Immortal
And I held your hand through all of these years
Cher
When you’re putting on your makeup it’s like you’re an artist but instead of painting a canvas you’re painting your face....
lady from Sherwood Park
I'm sorry if my first attempt at sun tanning in a bikini in public in 13 years "grossed you out". I'm sorry that my stomach isn't flat and tight. I'm sorry that my belly is covered in stretch marks. I'm NOT sorry that my body has housed, grown, protected, birthed and nurtured FIVE fabulous, healthy, intelligent and wonderful human beings. I'm sorry if my 33 year old, 125 lb body offended you so much that you felt that pointing, laughing, and pretending to kick me. But I'll have you know that as I looked at your 'perfect' young bodies, I could only think to myself "what great and amazing feat has YOUR body done?". I'll also have you know that I held my head high, unflinching as you mocked me, pretending that what you said and did had no effect on me; but I cried in the car on the drive home. Thanks for ruining my day. It's people like you who make this world an ugly hateful place. I can't help but feel sorry for the women who will one day bear your children and become "gross" in your eyes as their bodies change during the miraculous process of pregnancy. I can only hope that one day you'll realize that my battle scars are something to be proud of, not ashamed of."
Onions and the Man
Yester And Now
I was a single child,
Single but, not alone.
Loner with a few mates
Few were but all-known.
Yester were dull classes,
Strong bonds and deathly foes.
Yester were the new glasses
Secret letters and valentine’s rose.
Yester were bunking periods,
Black ticket movies and walks back home.
Yester was the neighbour’s girl,
Taking her out ‘like a walk in Rome’.
Yester were the afternoons,
The games and the ground.
Yester were bruising the knees,
The getting lost and coming found.
Yester were the year endings
The feasts in winter nights.
Yester were the sleepovers,
Friends and the pillow fights.
Yester was when, we met
Each day and every day.
When we fought and patched
And on the roof we’d lay.
Yester was then, but now is here.
Yester was slow but now is fast.
Yester is memory and yester is gone,
But, now is here, and now will last.
Now is the internet
Facebook, mails and twitter
Now are the likes, status and updates
Sometimes smiles and sometimes bitter.
Now is coming home late
Evenings dark and home alone.
Now is movie in a multiplex,
Chatting on mobile phone.
Yester were the friends few,
We were brothers in play and crime.
But now the list is in hundreds
Not one has the attention prime.
Yester was foolish anger
And fights over the class girl.
Now is seminars, parties, meetings
Dazzling women in shining pearls.
Yester was togetherness
The Bonding and brotherhood.
Now is connectivity, inclusiveness
Being updated, one always should.
Yester were load-shedding nights
Friends, cousins and the starry sky.
Now is the conditioned room, skyline
And solitude in the apartment high.
http://allpoetry.com/poem/11594031-Yester-And-Now-by-Leaf-of-Spring
Lying Half naked
Im here, lying on my bed
Covering my half naked body
With a sheet of purple green and red.
Worn out, in a shabby state.
A long week's load past
And a rough week waiting ahead
But, but today a mid week holiday.
Away from work and lazy at home,
Unshaven face and tired to the bone,
I lay pass the afternoon breeze.
Intermittent rain on the window crease,
Occasional horn from a rickshaw down below
Irritating neighbour playing the radio,
And I lie half naked covered half by the sheet
As the wet breeze passes by
I'm here, unshaven, unfresh... Im beat.
100 years since the First World War
Creative And Crazy
Challenges notwithstanding, these psychotic tendencies translate well in creative endeavors through what Eysenck refers to as over-inclusiveness.
If creativity is the process of coming up with novel and meaningful solutions to perplexing problems, then over-inclusiveness is the ability to see more and more ideas as relevant to a possible solution.
Over-inclusiveness is a cognitive trait that forms a foundation for divergent thinking, the method used to explore many possible solutions based on unexpected connections.
Divergent thinking is the hallmark of creative generalists.
- Wander and wonder
- Synthesize and summarize
- Link and leap
- Mix and match
- Experience and empathize